Its crazy to think that I want to be depressed. And when I'm happy I'll swear to god that happy is the only way to be but when I'm down I don't see how I could be up. Because I know that my happiness is just increased avoidence. That to be up is just to keep busy and keep my mind on other things. And wile I enjoy it more I know its just deceiving myself. And that wile I'm killing myself when I'm depressed I see clearly and I know the truth and maybe that is more important.
I can see forever
6 hours ago
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